The following post is a fusion of ideas at 4:36 am between me and my significant half!
This post is not only based on my own perspective and opinion but it is also an observation of the consumerism tendencies in myself.
With the current demonetisation scenario one thing is surely up for change and that is the concept of ‘Market’. The bubble had swelled up enormously enough to upset the balance of the Eco system.
The hype, the frenzied activity and the liveliness of a buzzing economy had a feel good factor for everyone. Suddenly we could see families doing rounds in the mall, shopping and eating together on a weekly basis as against going to shop for festivals, functions and basic needs.
Services and products were being thought of, designed and packaged to cater to demands of individual and groups.
The downside of this was however the indiscriminate use of resources and a failure to think fully about the cleanup and refilling of resources.
Plastic and varied types of packaging along with the carbon footprints were growing without a thought or process to tackle it wisely.
Children were targeted to be taken to moon, well almost(actually to NASA)! To be shown the heights of growth and glory, to suggest and nudge them towards economic growth.
Did anyone think or care for their discarded tissues, water bottles, files, folders, food trays and packaging of all sorts?
Similarly, the organised birthday parties and weddings with tonnes of paper, flowers and food which turns useless and is left overflowing from the dustbin.
The various apparels, appliances, jewellery for woman and services to make her look delectably perfect were they enough to fill up her rightful anger, low self esteem and pain? The market was full of commodities to numb the pain temporarily.
Yet if we continue this way any longer we would have raided the entire planet in less than a decade!
This morning we had a debate at home about all the propaganda kinda messages on family whatsapp group about Mody and Government….how these messages seem pesky and inappropriate on the extended family whatsapp group!
We are living in a democracy with a chosen elected representative and not in some Raja-Praja system.
If anything needs to be praised it is the people who have largely agreed to this experiment and doing their bit to maintain peace while helping each other. People have managed to retain their sanity and not give in to fear and panic. By and large the law and order is being followed even though it has caused some inconvenience and calls for planning expenditures differently.
Last weekend after a call from relatives on stocking up I selected about 78 and odd stuff from big basket(groceries, veggies, fruits etc.). And then I decided to not go ahead with this panic shopping….having 5 kgs of wheat flour and rice might give me some extra food but thats not what the solution is!
I have survived this week and so did the nation and hope it continues to be so. And even if there are problems may we come up with viable solutions and camaraderie.
Its time to own up with the collective and self responsibility…. no more one person to be praised or to be brought down!
So, I came across this term in a book Action Bias.
This was such a Aha moment for me as the understanding kicked in… I had been pushing myself to do something, anything to justify my existence.
We are brought up to keep doing things to improve and move ahead…our first teachers our parents pushed us to study and learn based on their model of the world. This was mostly met with resistance as we were not aware of the rewards or the usefulness of this. It meant a boring activity more like a burden which threatened our relaxing into our being, thoughts, dreams and existence.
Ultimately, we gave in thinking it was something which was a necessary thing to do to survive in this world and become somebody. As an adult we find that all that learning was of no use as we could not connect it to a larger picture. Once past the learning stage comes a vacuum which cannot be filled with knowledge…wisdom was required. Some people seem to get it and some keep seeking looking up to authority figures or the ones who looked sorted.
What is missing was the lessons in courage, wisdom, resilience and a lack of self-knowledge. These things are not taught at school and left to be figured out through experiences. Some people keep themselves open to such learning experiences others make safety nets and follow the older role models to fit in effortlessly.
The unfortunate ones keep trying by being in the frenzy of doing this and that to generally fill the hole left by a lack of direction, a conviction of self till one day they realise that how much ever they try to fill in the hole the gap remains.
It is possible to wake up and realise your truth to live your purpose which isn’t incessant activity as this frenzied activity is short termed and dries up at some point or the other. When that happens it is stressful as the need to birth the creativity becomes pushing to become a useful expression.
So there are a lot of women out there who want to break out sick with the behaviour of men in their lives.
While the behaviour is intolerable and unforgiving as it attacks the self confidence and self respect yet they are unable to raise their voice against it and even accept that it hurts while it happens again and again… relentlessly.
What is behind this inability is it the way they were brought up to go through hurtful behaviour while growing up with parents and siblings?
Does it feel shameful that it is happening to them and they do not want to scream or ask for help. Is it the guilt of feeling inadequate which keeps them in low energy and vibration unable to feel good for themselves and validate self for feeling deserving of good behaviour.
It is one thing to point the wrong and another to keep them in fear, guilt and shame so that they would accept it as their responsibility to let it remain a secret, wound perhaps addiction.
Wonder what would help heal this pattern which continues to wage a war as much within as outside.
What needs to change, shift?
How do we strengthen the feminine without making them masculine?
Where does it all start and where does it end?
You may have heard this term quite often ‘let go’.
Oh haven’t you felt annoyed about what and how of it…what is one supposed to let go. How does one let go. Is it a switch to be pressed…wouldn’t that be easier for us.
So, I did some thinking and a few probabilities that came up were:
exhale-let go and get back to normal breathing
let go of expectations-changing the state from wanting to ready to receive
let go of how-do not hold onto how it should manifest
let go of final outcome-appreciate it in any form it arrives
The truth I hear is we are not even in control. Yes we can request but how and when we get it is not really in our hands. It sure is a friendly universe that either the wish comes true or something better happens unless we block it with our fears, doubts, anxieties etc.
So till then chill and let go…..pffff
One can choose to love or hate something, anything, parents, spouse or even the self.
Though hate is good too as it indicates what one does not like but continuing to wallowing in it is harmful to one’s own health. So if you are going to make a choice make an informed one.
Sometimes fake or desperate love masks the deeper hate which comes out every now and then to attack the other person when the burden is too heavy to carry.
it is good to be aware of one’s own inner feelings to be authentic within themselves and others.
Suppose a son hates father and does not work through his feelings he might end up taking it out on himself overworking, not following his real passion, indulging in addictions etc. He might go ahead and even take it out on his wife denying her feelings and not supporting her mentally, emotionally, economically or socially.
This is done subtly and may not be even be the intention of the person acting it out. However it is one’s responsibility to be aware of such patterns and get help. Else it may blow up when it becomes too bothersome to carry and then it spreads.
Some good questions would be to ask yourself are:
Do you feel that your needs are getting met?
Are you being respected in your relationship?
Are you able to freely ask for what you want?
Are you mostly trying to make others happy and finsihing their work on time while ignoring basic maintenance for yourself?
Does you relaxation only mean watching TV, reading papers, drinking and smoking indiscriminately?
Do you experience physical well being?
Do you feel like making a better contact with spouse and children yet feel the lack of connection?
Whatever you chose would be an active driver in your life and relationships.
Wake up,look around, take charge…you can make the change!
How often do we find ourselves wanting to do something really nice and new for ourselves yet we don’t take immediate action and we sink back to our old ways of doing and being.
what stops us from bringing that new light, perspective, situation, experience into our lives?
lack of purpose
belief in oneself
trust in life
the voice that says it is too much, not good enough, not safe.
Meanwhile life goes on and we end up doing many things we don’t want to do or habitually repeating some.
Got an idea…execute within 36 hours!